3.16.2011

How Fights Start!


I like hearty laughter, who doesn’t need one? well, at least President Obama knows he still needs to snatch some laughter even though the world is on his shoulders!

Laughter releases your mind and relieves the tensions in your muscles. When you have a bad day at work or you come home and find… things..not quite what you wished for!! Or you get your whole week screwed up! you certainly need to cheer up or you’re just at the verge of a heart attack. Well, I picked a few of our exchanged “day breakers”. Have fun reading the following. Remember, life is too good to spend it in rage and tension… after all tomorrow is still another day!

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So, How Do Fights Start!

My wife sat down on the seat next to me as I was flipping channels. She asked, 'What's on TV?'

I said, 'Dust.'!

And then the fight started...
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Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, and slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the boat up to the van, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day.

I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, "The weather out there is terrible."

My loving wife of 5 years replied, "Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?"

And that's how the fight started...

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I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road and slowly the other driver got out of his car. You know how sometimes you just get soooo stressed and little things just seem funny? Yeah, well I couldn't believe it.... He was a DWARF!!! He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, "I AM NOT HAPPY!!!"

So, I looked down at him and said, "Well, then which one are you?"

And then the fight started.....
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My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. She said, "I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds.."

I bought her a bathroom scale.

And then the fight started....
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When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her some place expensive.... so, I took her to a petrol station!

And then the fight started...
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My wife and I were sitting at a table at my school reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken lady swinging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table.

My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'

"Yes," I sighed, "she’s my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since."

'My God!' says my wife, "who would think a person could go on celebrating that long!"

And then the fight started....
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I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason took my order first. "I'll have the steak, medium rare, please."

He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?"

"Nah", I said, "she can order for herself!"

And then the fight started....
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A woman was standing nude, looking at the bedroom mirror. She was not happy with what she saw and said to her husband, "I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment."

The husband replied, "Your eyesight's damn near perfect."

And then the fight started.....
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Huh! On a second thought, how do we really get into fights??? I believe these are just examples of how most of our little fights begin and grow into conflicts!! and we wonder why the other person doesn’t understand us!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Funny, I enjoyed them. what's it about them man and wife! always got issues going on!

Gery J.

AzandeNetworkers said...

Hey, I guess that is what makes life fun, adding some spices to it (reasonably!). Thanks Gery for visiting.